Dear Chela: Why do I dodge commitment?

Do you ever back away from commitment? One foot in, one foot out? Maybe you hang out in the deliberation zone wondering if you should move forward? At times, we do want to jump in. We do want to be fully in. In this episode of Dear Chela, I explore what might be holding you back and how having both feet in can liberate you. Watch below!


I’m super curious about your perspective! What do you think of how I’ve approached this question? Do you have any insights to add? Any struggles on this topic? how do you trust yourself? Have you ever felt that committing was actually liberating? I’d love to hear from you in the comments below!

Have your own burning question?  Ask me here


Dear Chela Banner

I’m an Integral Master Coach™, Master Certified Coach, writer, mother & people lover. My gifts are centered around helping others to meet their calling and unleash their genius, on behalf of our shared world. Get to know me...


  1. This was a nice post! I think that you are spot in relationship to what feels counter-intuitive about commitment and also having to somehow, self-assess along the way when your current commitment is raising issues of concern and the importance of addressing that.


  2. JJ says:

    I love the re-framing of that: I AM AN OPTIONS PERSON.

    Wow. Yes.

    Trusting yourself and the process, and the Universe is a big game-changer. I’ve been living in that place for a couple of weeks now and it is such a relief.

    Also, “giving a voice to your wants and needs”. AMEN! I didn’t realize how little of this I was actually doing. Giving all of those things a voice has brought so much peace, clarity, and confidence to my life.

    But, it has caused a lot of shifts in my personal/romantic relationship. I am now trying to figure out how to have both feet in, in both places.. I need more legs to stand on 😉

    Thank you Chela! I love the one-take idea 🙂

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