Dear Chela: How can I figure out what work I’m meant to do?

What if you have followed all of the rules, taken action, reached out externally and walked down a multitude of paths to find meaningful work…and you still don’t know what you want? This Dear Chela episode offers a way to start exploring your interior and finally start to uncover what matters to you in your career.

What about you? Did anyone else feel they went through this crisis? What helped? Let’s relate in the comments below.

Have your own burning question? Ask me here


Dear Chela Banner

I’m an Integral Master Coach™, Master Certified Coach, writer, mother & people lover. My gifts are centered around helping others to meet their calling and unleash their genius, on behalf of our shared world. Get to know me...


  1. Rachel says:

    Chela! Chela! Chela!
    Thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for your kind, honest, and heart-felt answer to my question. I watched this at work this morning with tears in my eyes–you get it. Thank you. I’ve taken your words to heart.

  2. Emma says:

    Oh my gosh, this is me. I mean, listening to this felt like you were speaking directly to me, as I’m in the same place. What really rang true was your advice at the end- that these are questions that you live over time. As much as I’ve wished and wished the last few years, answers havn’t just ‘dropped’ in. And I’ve found looking at others journeys only hurts and takes me further away from mine, so true about using them instead to reflect. Thankyou for answering this and broadening my scope of what this is and means and how to further go about the work, it’s super soul satisfying to know you get it. ❤️

  3. Anita says:

    Hi Rachel, I could have written the same question. As Chela says it IS really painful. In your question when you said I am privledged so whats my problem I immediately could relate. Check out this book….it really helped open my eyes to see what I had missed in my life even though I was so privileged… The book is called Running on Empty by Jonice Webb. Its a book about what wasnt in your childhood, the white space, the gaps in your privledged upbringing that leave you feeling like you do as a 25-year old who “should” have it all together by now. You can get seriously wounded in childhood by what wasnt there, not just stuff that did happen, and its way more subtle to detect. I have a sense this book with open your eyes in a big way, get you to put down the big stick that beats you up no end and come to realise what you didnt get in childhood matters. Im slowly getting filled up on what i missed i missed in childhood from therapy and i cannot begin to even describe how so many of the anxieties that i had (which were almost a copy of yours) literally just start to melt away when you start to receive that which you never got.
    Another great book is by Conrad Baars “born only once” (this title is based on having a physical birth but not having a sound psychological birth from sufficient love and affirmation in childhood) and his other book “healing the unaffirmed”.
    Sending you a big hug and wishing you well on your journey to Rachel. Its definately all inward from here. Youve probably spent a lifetime looking out for answers all while youve been running on empty. Xxx

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